I hope i can find the day to forgive myself.
I had you and i lost you. I was blinded and i let the most insignificant of things
take control of my life. When the most important of person in my life was slipping away. How could i been so off track? I took you for granted. You never know what you got till its gone.


''You float like a feather
In a beautiful world
I wish I was special
You're so fucking special
But I'm a creep,
I'm a weirdo
What the hell am I doing here?
I don't belong here''


Memories of you and me, they haunt me wherever i go. I cannot escape it. I won't erase them even if it kills me to. In the mall when you were going for a job briefing and you would run off to the toilet to give me a kiss. Shopping for groceries. I want orange jabbas!

You and me had something special. People who knew us would admit it. The times when we were together it was all about our own little world. Bonnie and clyde, all i need in this life of sin, is me and my.........


One thing good has come out of all this though, we did learn where we went wrong.
Be it in our long-distance relationship or when we were on the same country. We lost touch of reality. The harshness of it all. And it came crashing like a train without brakes before we could prepare for it.

''No matter what I do
All I think about is you
Even when I’m with my Boo
You know I’m crazy over you''


Three years, 36 months 37 weeks 1095 days and billions of ''i love yous'. Could we have worked it out? i don't know. Do i want another chance? No, i don't want. I need another chance.
Regret is a strong word. You use it when you admit you've done something you wish you could have taken back.Some people use it when they can still salvage things. Some people use it when the realise it is too late. Unfortunately it was the latter for me. I don't usually regret things.
But if only we could turn back time.
I'm not asking for another chance. That's not right of me. And it's unfair to you. I just want you to know how colourful you made my life after i met you. I meant that in a good way. The holiday in July was unbeilevable. Felt like we were adults and married. No parents to curfews. only abit of a money problem. But we were so free. And i understand why you like it there so much more.


''Come up to meet you, Tell you i'm sorry,
You don't know how lovely you are
It's such a shame for us to part
Nobody said it was easy
No one ever said it would be this hard
take me back to the start ''


Went to wala wala at holland V last night. The live band was quite good. But there was this disturbing plump guy who sat infront of the stage and kept singing along with the band with so much passion. You might ask, so what's wrong with that? And i would tell you to imagine him licking his lips , touching himself and swaying like a pole dancer on a stool and you would know something is definately wrong.
There was this midget waitress too. Really cute. haha. Like a 12 year old girl serving beer.

Met this girl of my friend's. Apparently she's leaving for somewhere for a very long time and her boyfriend didn't want to spend time with her. Need i say how much he'll regret it the day after she leaves?

Was stopped at a road block on the way home last night. I was doing 80 on a 50. Fucking lucky the officer didn't really care. And luckily i only had about half a bottle of beer. weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee



''im just another heart in need of rescue,
Waiting on loves sweet charity
And I'm gonna hold on
For the rest of my days,
cos I know what it means
To walk along the lonely street of dreams''


To those who will get to know her and to those who already do. LeAnn is a very special person. Don't take her for granted or you'll regret it with your heart. like i did.


i'm such an emo fucker.sob sob sob wake up motherfucker.